Step 8: Learn to trust the process.
It’s been awhile since I wrote the last blogpost, and a lot has happened. There’s been the whole website move to a different hosting site, and I’m no techie folks! Luckily, I have a friend, Deb Miller (www.DeborahCMiller.com), who took charge of the process and got it done efficiently and easily. Thank you, Deb!
So, how am I doing in learning to trust the process of this miracle (I am my Core Self) as it is coming into being? I’m having trouble knowing how to start writing because my mind is going in two different directions at the same time. I’d better write those down, and then take them one at a time.
One direction has to do with Core Self and Wholeness; the other is about Honoring and Self-Compassion.
All of that is embedded and saturated inside of the courage that it takes to be a human being.
Let me begin with the concepts of Core Self and Wholeness. As you already know, Core Self is what I’ve used to describe myself when I feel connected to all that is. My nephew, Ben Leffers (www.craftindy.com), alluded beautifully to this state of being connected in a writing that he shared on social media the other day. He wrote about being in the snowy woods in winter, “if you stand as still as possible, the silence is strong enough to come alive.” Beautiful, eh? I have probably felt this feeling of connectedness most strongly when I’ve either been steeped in deep Nature or when I am meditating.
When I close my eyes and ask my self to feel the connectedness of the Core Self, it is an experience of connectedness of all consciousness, Big Nature, the Universe.
The word “Wholeness” takes this connected experience to another level for me. When I close my eyes and ask internally to feel the connectedness of Wholeness, the experience begins with the feeling of roots moving down into the earth from the soles of my feet. It begins with this experience of being part of the biology of the earth, and as such, I am completely supported and nourished by the Earth. This connection then expands to include all of consciousness, Big Nature, and the Universe. Including the succulence of being human, part of the Earth’s biological expression, has come directly from my weekly discussions with friends, Ann Beeching (www.annbeeching.com), and Ellen Sauer (http://www.ellensauer.com). Thank you, Ann and Ellen. You deepen my experience of life and my own humanity through our discussions.
Okay, on to “Honoring and Self-Compassion.” In this life journey, I have had a tendency to discount what I’ve done and focus instead, on either what I didn’t get to, or on what I did wrong. This has been true on every imaginable level. I don’t think I’m singular in this regard–I think lots of folks out there are like me.
However, in learning to trust the process, as I work on this miracle and on others (that are at varying levels of completion), I have come to the realization that practicing self-compassion is crazy important. The work of self-compassion is in the action of practicing kindness to oneself. It is the activity of standing “as still as possible,” and listening to “the silence that is strong enough to come alive,” and when there, looking kindly at who you are, right now, in the middle of working this miracle, doing your best, and behaving with as much integrity as you can toward yourself.
CL (Choose Love),